H week

so i am this crazy person who makes a hell week for myself... yes i know. retarded, but hey... after losing all of the 5 pounds that I've gained in the past month in just this week... it is worth it!

i have been eating so freaking good, working out 2-3 times a day and getting some great sleep. also loading up on tons of vitamins... my work drawers are like a freaking pharmacy! But I feel so amazing! I don't feel gross anymore. i have not only noticed a difference on the scale, but on my skin, my hair, my nails, my mind, my attitude and most of all... my happiness! i needed this week to get me motivated for the next 12 weeks to come and i definitely got that motivation! Not only from how good i feel, but from my Cam and his flight plans! and since I posted those plans basically everywhere, including the fridge, everyone asks about it, which makes me more excited and gives me more motivation!

in the next 12 weeks i have 7 pounds to lose and a ton of muscle to gain but I know that I can do it! after all... I have already lost 16 pounds! I have decided that the past few weeks were enough stress for the year and I am going to make these next 12 weeks the happiest ones ever. Of course there are always stressful times, but it doesn't mean you have to be stress. it's a choice and I will choose not to be.

Its amazing how clear my mind has gotten this week and how motivated and determined I am. I know what I want and my mind is set! A big BIG apology for my behavior the past few weeks to everyone! Stress, bad eating, that blasted period and missing my Sweetheart literally killed me and got to me in the worst way. I promise I will be better and i know you will all notice it... I promise I haven't turned into a monster! haha I really do love you all :)

Anyways, this week has been an incredible success and I am happy! Now none of you are allowed to tempt me with naught treats for the next 12 weeks and if you want to talk about cam... i really don't mind it :) 88 days ya'll! :)

Big Secret!

Wanna know a secret?

The secret on how to lose weight?

Because, I know it! I know the biggest secret to losing weight... that actually works! And I am just that nice to share it with you all! here it is...

Eat healthy and work out!

Yep, that's it! That is the big secret!

So forget the pills, cleanses, expensive diet plans and your hot personal trainer... because you don't need them :)

You're welcome :)

June

so my race is in 19 days...

am I freaking out? you know... maybe!
but by the time race day comes around I will be ready and I will be 7 pounds thinner :)

bring it on June!

days of wonderful

Yesterday I got a surprise call from Maggie, my cute friend in Edinburg, Texas saying that she had just talked to Cam! She was going to see him as we spoke, he is staying in Edinburg for a few days. Lucky duck! She is such a sweetheart though and sends me pictures and videos of my cute boy. Look at him! He is so freaking skinny and looking just wonderful :) I may have been just giddy and happy in every way possible last night. I am in love :)

We have come so far in so many ways individually as well as a couple. He is my example and he tells me I am his. I am so proud of us and we still have 6 more months to get ourselves to exactly where we want to be. 

This bottom picture is of me two years ago vs. me today. I always saw a major change in Cam, but had never realized the change that I was making as well. These past few months have been rough trying to stay motivated to reach my goals and not going back on everything I had already accomplished. These pictures are my definite motivation to keep going.

I guess you could say I am a pretty happy girl right now :)

craving?

yesterday guess who just ran 5 miles like a boss?

me.

yes, me.

so what do i want to do now?

go running.

huh? me, want to go running?

this is my confession, i am beginning to like running. crave it really. who would have thought i would get there?

oh and guess who has lost 15 pounds?

me.

i feel extremely accomplished! woot! this is definitely going to be a great summer!

everyday i just get one step closer to completing all my goals that i have to complete before cam is home. feels wonderful!

better

today i am going to have a better day and be happy. i apologize to all those i was a brat to yesterday, i guess the "chocolate craving time" took over control. I had some pretty fun conversations with my two mom's though because of it, they always make me smile and laugh. but today i will start my day off right and good. and it already has been a pretty good morning although i have only been up for 15 minutes. remember everything i ate yesterday? yes, the whole world. well, i get on the scale to see how much i gained and remember, i have this 146.4 barrier. 146.... hmmmm interesting. i'll take it though! i also woke up to a clean room! guess i forgot i spent all night cleaning it yesterday. i slept in (yes 6 am is sleeping in) and woke up smelling like tanning lotion, perfect temp and listening to the birds outside my window. almost perfect! give it a year and it will definitely be perfect. yesterday i was missing my cam so so much, and last night i had a dream about going to pick him up from the airport...i can do it! 199! thats all i have left. i feel like this will be such a better day.

here's to eating good, clean clothes and a smile for the day :)

accomplished

this morning's run.... amazing! i am so glad i was able to get my butt out of bed and onto the track. the beautiful weather helped out a ton too. those 3.5 miles felt so freaking good! confidence booster for sure because i really was thinking i couldn't do this! but i can :)

except now my Achilles tendons hurt, which is kinda scary. I went to the physical therapist today and he massaged them and taped them and he says that hopefully they are just really sore because im building muscle. nothing is going to stop me though! looks like only upper body tonight and tomorrow.

baby week

well this is the week! a week for change. jamie is having her baby on wednesday. a new baby in the family, it just doesn't get better than that. cameron is finally getting transferred to kingsville. i can tell he is excited for his "baby" and i quote, "im dialated to about a 8 haha cause out on the mission we say we are pregnant and we are going to have a baby.... its gonna be so fun and me and Jamie are having babies at the same time!" im sorry honey, but that is just a little weird haha. its fine. with all this baby stuff going on i may have become a bit more baby hungry. which is okay, until i made the huge mistake of telling cam that. he wants a baby so bad. we would have a honeymoon baby if he had it his way. so when i said that, he about went through the roof. sorry to get your hopes up baby, but its NOT happening for a while! anyways, my change for the week is that i am actually going to lose weight! the past few weeks i have just sucked haha so i think its time to get back into my good eating and working out and dropping the pounds. it will be a good week though and email day was just the thing to start the wonderful week off! :)

5 weeks

just watch me kick all of your butts.

be ready, because in 5 weeks, you'll see the difference.

ready set go!

ugh.

plateau's suck. that's all really.
i think my body sleeps through my alarm on purpose because it knows what i am about to do to it... good thing im still running tonight. fooled ya there!
i have this experiment, that kind of makes no sense, but i will try it anyways. if it works, i will let you know my secret :)

training sucks.

because i am indefinitely out of shape, i started training a week early.

kill me now.
those thoughts in my head, the little minions working up there that keep telling me that i can't run, keep getting louder and louder.

my body hates me. and i just want to eat the world due to the amount of exercise i do actually complete.

but on the bright side

i have lost another pound this week that was unexpected,

i am running

and im still eating good.

i may not know everything there is to know about running, but at least i am doing it right? tips needed.

you know what sucks though? when you give yourself a rest day and so you can actually sleep in, then those minions upstairs don't get the memo and i am wide awake at 5 am. i should have just got up and worked out because i couldn't go back to sleep. dang you.

guilty as charged

i have been doing really good with eating healthy and since i started training today i have even more motivation to eat right...

except when you are faced with giant cookies.

i was craving some kind of chocolate and i know what i should have eaten, but the cookie looked so good. in my defense i only ate half of it, but that half ended up being enough calories for a full meal. ugh.

now the guilty feeling comes and i get to feel bad about eating that cookie all day haha. i shouldn't because im still under calories... but it happens.

where have i been?

I apologize for my absence and lack of acknowledgement for this dear blog.

ready for an update?!

lets start with st. george. love the place dearly, especially laying out in the wonderful warm sun and getting a small neon tan (the red color on my skin). we may have eaten our little hearts out but its all good. no worries there. it was nice to just get away and be with kayt and the family. did i mention that i love to terrorize my brother so i wrote all over my car for him? he loves me :)

i know you are all wondering about the diet that you probably all expect that i have given up on, based upon my track record. boooya mother crackers! this girl right here has lost 9 pounds and im still going! didn't see that one coming right? well then wait till the next paragraph...

i freaking am registered for a half marathon. possibly the worst decision of my life. i may die, don't worry i will include you all in my will. but time to start training so you will get to hear all about that for the next few months. go me!

i am still definitely in love with my sweetheart and he is the best thing in my life. he is just perfect and i couldn't ask for anything more. 233 more days say what???

i went to my ward winter conference that was a success and i am actually falling in love with my singles ward. never knew i could, but they are all so great :)

my life may be dramatic, but oh well.... just gotta keep going and looking up and take whatever comes your way. :) just smile and keep walking forward. no need to be stuck in the past, then you are going nowhere.

work is work... thats all haha

well thats all i can think of. :) i promise i will post more! see ya!

sleep?

my alarm woke me up around 4:30 this morning. plenty of time to just lay in my bed, close my eyes and let my mind wander before getting up and going to work out.

oh no.

i open my eyes, thinking it is probably 5 now and i should get up and go make breakfast. i look at the time. 5:52.

blasted.

another workout i slept through. maybe i need the sleep. definitely working out tonight though.

so much to do this day. good thing that i still have 3 days to lose 4 pounds. wish me luck!

vs angel?

summer bikini body here i come!

follow me on my journey here.

disclaimer: the first two weeks are summaries, but after that it is my daily and weekly thoughts as i continue on my journey to a better me :)

prizes

I find myself extremely unmotivated when it comes to my weight loss situation.
so I found a way to make it more of a game with prizes and fun stuff.
Don't Laugh! I am serious about this!
I get a prize for each pound I lose and every 5 pounds I lose I get a big prize!
I am so excited!
Plus, for everyday that I eat healthy = to $2 I get to spend on anything I want on my "big trip" this year. This is so wonderful! :)

peace out.

this is the official peace out to all of my bad habits concerning exercise and healthy eating.

now watch me kick some butt!

much love 

:)

Wisdom Teeth.

the best, secret, diet known to man.
why?
you can't eat solids,
it forces you to eat slowly,
you end up drinking alot of water to make up for the food you cant eat.
basically,
you starve.
but its great!

And I am still swollen.
I will probably write you a whole detailed story about it all.
but not now.
love,
your chunky chipmunk,
me.

what have i been up to?

no blogging for two full days?

this is unheard of!

but true.

Friday was filled with a whole lot of nothing,

except for the fact that we got Cam's SD card. That makes each day a fantastic day!

He is doing great and is just as cute as ever! He sings in this one and i adore it much.

then I managed to fall asleep at 8:30... yes i am 90 years old.

I woke up at 3:45 which is no shocker and thought of the Christmas presents I still needed to get.

Might I say that I had some genious ideas and have pretty much all my christmas shopping done! woot woot!

I also picked out a dashing outfit for Tazz for Preference... I rule.

JAMIE IS HAVING A BABY GIRl!!!!!!

yeah yeah!!

Little Sarah Ella...

so adorable! :)

I love babies!

I tried to eat healthy yesterday... until about 9 AM when my mom had me and Tazz pick up 6 dozen daylight dougnuts...

that was the end of that.

dane it

I made it to Tazz's first Jr. Jazz game and laughed my head off at the ridiculousness.

what sillys.

I took a shower finally, now that it is around 4 pm.

Side Note: I just got the Mane and Tail shampoo and conditioner and am loving it!!

anyways... 

i then was supposed to go babysit my cute kate and jake, but was not needed in the end,

and was entertained by kellie as she tried to put in a car seat, talked to jake like he was a dog and scarfed down the destroyed chocolate cake sitting on the counter with me.

it was as if she had never had kids! 

pretty funny stuff!

then home where i endulged in some brick oven and fell asleep on the couch at about 8 pm.

i now know why i do not have friends,

i go to sleep at 8 and wake up at 3...

pretty sure no one else would be up to doing that with me haha

crazy story though!!

so i finally walked up to my bed around 9:30ish and went to sleep.

i had this really scary/disturbing dream and finally woke up from it! gahh!

so then i hear noises coming from outside my door and i think "alright my dream is coming true and they are going to take me away"

oh but then i grab my phone ready to call 911 and see that it is only 11pm!!!

its my parents getting ready for bed.

wow.

then this morning i wake up with lots of energy and decided to go workout,

might i say that you shouldn't work out on fast sunday... not the best thing haha

so i start out with the bike and feel all determined. 

then after 6.26 minutes,

im bored.

so what do i do?

turn on some just dance.

and this is what we end up with....

yes that is a drawn on mustache.

and hair on the top of my head.

and i did sing.

and that is all i will disclose.

i feel like today will be a good day :)

i apologize for such a long post.

more to come later!

reality

my new realistic goal:
1-2 pounds a week.

because sometimes you can't lose 20 pounds all at once.