nerves.

update: the webinar went okay if you ignore my stuttering, childish words, and shaky voice. they are just overall awkward and bothersome. its whatever though. i did it! accomplished.
update: I LOVE SCHOOL! my class was amazing, i don't know why i was so nervous. the spirit was so strong and although my teacher speaks like a speed racer, he is so awesome. there is something about byu campus that makes you happy and want to work hard and be at school. i am so blessed. and even though i may have been freaking out about money and not being able to graduate three weeks after cam came home... i may want to stay there just a little bit longer. i would recommend byu to everyone!

last night i may have had a slight freak out slash breakdown. i wanted to add another class at byu but didn't have the money for it. i was regretting buying my car and wishing i didn't have to make a car payment. i felt like i was missing out on college life and wished i would have moved in with kiley. it was just an overall pitty on me moment.
conclusion: i was extremely tired.
now that i am well rested i realize how lucky i am with the job i have, the schooling i am able to do, the school i go to, the funds i have, the learning experiences i have, and the blessing of the gospel i have in my life. i just have to stop feeling bad for myself and do something with my life and work hard to be the best i can be. so what i can only do 2 classes a semester right now. the funds will come and give a little bit more time at byu. my car could really be a blessing in desguise, whether that is learning a lesson or teaching me to manage money better or helping build my credit for later life. i don't know yet but i know there is a reason for everything and i just have to push forward in faith.

i know you just wanted to  read about all of my personal issues and apiphanies but hey maybe you are going through the same thing and hopefully this will help you!